I am, The one thing in this world that I know for sure. This indeed is earth but my existence on this planet is very different to yours. My version is not as you know it, in my world I observe lives where everyone spends their time going around exaggerating their purposes being happy, sad, tired, scared regardless of species you are all the same. All animals go to and fro from place to place every day feeling the air on their faces and breathing the pure winds of life until, the day we come face to face. When the day comes only few are truly happy to walk with me, accept what has happened and call it what it is. Humans especially I find are always missing the picture, every day I see them work for the trivial pleasures they have created such as fame and working for fortune but when it comes to the end of every story nobody is ever ready to close the book nor can they look back and say “Life well lived”. Not all are like this but those whom I have watched over as they live life fast and free are something special, they glow a little brighter and by the time I have done my job I feel good for a soul that was not wasted.
I would describe a day at work but it’s not a day for me, I never stop working. No I simply am, my existence is as if I were one of you just aimlessly standing in the noisy clustered city streets pondering what comes next, or running through the forest leaving fresh paw prints in the soil and smelling the natural fragrant blend provided by surrounding nature. The only difference is that for me all sounds are always distorted and dampened as if you had spent your life wearing a pair of earmuffs, the sounds I can hear are limited to few matching my beautifully simple three colour visual spectrum. feelings are another thing that has always eluded me, I am never to feel air on my face or the warmth of the sun on my skin never to just enjoy a moment, who or whatever made me decided that I will observe and am not made to feel however after 530 million years it would seem learning to feel is possible. imagine you were a mere human but you had been hit so hard your very soul was bumped out of your body, a step out of reality and the world moved on without you, that is me. Unseen by anyone human or animal I am not dissimilar to a ghost, watching over people just spending my time roaming around with an unfinished task I am yet to complete.
Surrounding me is only ever three colors but all of the shades in the universe. The only way for someone such as yourself to understand is that everything in my world is represented by a colour. a glistening silver for all types of living organisms, A charcoal black outline for terrain such as streets, buildings, hills, trees everything. the world’s sights and so called “Beautiful features” appear dark and featureless and finally a deep pure blue, marks a lost soul in need of guidance. the sky is an ocean of fog which cloaks the world like a blanket on what you humans know as a “cold Morning” always swirling around with gentle currents flowing like a river. ever since the beginning of time I have heard about the taste of food, oh how i lust after one bite of an apple pie or just a taste of your “cake” but as a young man once said to me on a journey through the gate together, “It’s a shame that we are always wanting what we can’t have and not what we can” alluding to the life he had lived and in a peculiar way his words applied to myself also. I am able to understand and sometimes feel simple human emotions such as cravings and satisfaction however I can never seem to understand sadness, love, sympathy or anything else really but as I have no equal it has always just been me and my work so no room for pondering emotions or feelings. Satisfaction comes to me when i have completed my job and even then the work load is never ending, more and more souls come every day and night splitting the fog the same way I once watched a man split the red sea.
Each individual soul is unique and yet many are the same, always speaking of a life that was still to come or how it was not time but that is not for me to decide. What comes after me I wouldn’t know as I said I am all I have ever known but who or whatever it is calls the shots I guess. I am what you could call “the souls chauffeur”, rather then being the boss my job is to lead souls toward who or what ever the boss is, and then when it is done my job is complete so the time comes for me to simply move on to the next and do my duty. I would tell you that this is a lonely life being all alone and yet just observing I learn more and more each day keeping me forever occupied between this and my work that is. The only animal that I can’t manage to fully understand is humans, always changing feelings, emotions, morals and I can never seem to work out their deal. Every human trying to understand things and ask questions they can never answer or hope to comprehend like what am I here for and who put us here?
Ultimately my favorite times are those when someone dies, company is always good as finally I can be seen and heard. However friends are another thing I can never have, I’m not allowed to keep souls for myself then once their gone it is rare I ever see them again. It would seem that although unlikely my superior decides on the occasion that it really wasn’t time and puts the fish back in the bowl but unlike me, everything that lives has a time.
Strangely enough on my travels to different souls I’ve noticed that some seem to have an idea of who I am and what comes after me. I have never had a “Name” of my own, I was not created or came to be with a name attached but many different people call me by many different things, Februus to the ancient Romans, Anubis to the Egyptians, Thanatos to the Greek, The grim reaper to most of Europe as well as many more. In the end it would seem everyone thinks of me as some sort of mythological Deity however I assure you I am no myth nor am I a legend. Life is beautiful but no one ever sees it until it is my turn to come and see them, I guess in a way I am the end of a life, the collector of souls, the guide of the dead… I am, Death